When Aubrey was just a wee baby, I had many non-parent friends ask me if it was hard being a mom. Honestly, I never felt like it was. Don't get me wrong, there were days that I felt overwhelmed. Aubrey was not an "angel baby", but she was just what I expected. She was a baby with needs and opinions, and I was okay with that. That's what I signed up for :)
I've come to realize that it's not the day in, day out duties of being a mom that make it "hard". It's actually the intense love, the overwhelming need to protect, the helplessness you feel when they're sick, that make being a mom "hard". Being a mom has made it nearly impossible for me to watch a crime show without crying (for not only the victim, but also the criminal that was probably unloved or abused in some way), has kept me up many nights when I'm worried about Aubrey being cold or sick, and has just plain made me more compassionate and emotional. It's a labor of love.
Last night was a "hard" night. Compared to some of the suffering that other mother's go through, it really wasn't THAT hard, but it was still harder than most nights. Aubrey has been sick with a little cold since Tuesday night, you know the runny nose, stuffy head kind. We were letting it run it's course. It would wake her up at night because she couldn't breathe, but nothing we couldn't deal with. Then yesterday we saw our first signs of the yellow mucus, which in my mind means keep a closer eye on it. We were still letting it run it's course. Then, last night she started acting weird. She wouldn't eat ANYTHING for dinner and she was REALLY shivering after her bath. I took her temperature...nothing. To bed she went. Then, she started fussing around 10:30. I usually let her fuss it out, but I decided to check on her before I went to bed. She was BURNING up! We gave her motrin and changed her to cooler jammies, but I noticed she was breathing really fast and I got PARANOID! An hour later, her temp hadn't gone down and she was still breathing funny. Brogan just got diagnosed with Croup on Thurs. and I didn't know if it was contagious, so being the worry wart I am, I wanted to take her to urgent care. When we got there her temp was still 103* an hour after the motrin. They gave her a Tylenol suppository and kept us there for an hour till her temp dropped (the lowest it got was 100.6*). Off we went with the diagnosis of an upper respitory infection and fever. We were to alternate Motrin and Tylenol at the same time to keep the fever down and let it run it's course. Justin knew it was nothing serious, but the mom in me had to go in and make sure. Better safe than sorry!
All this to say, that sometimes being a mom is hard, but I'm BLESSED immensly! Blessed that my baby is healthy for the most part. Blessed that I only have to deal with the "hard" times every once in a while. Blessed that I have medical care nearby and that I can afford it. And most of all, blessed that I have a baby to love, to worry about, and to care for. Praise God that she's fine and that scary night is over.
10 comments:
Oh Barbie you have such good perspective. I'm really sorry about the scary night! I'm glad you took her to intensive care. Poor Aubrey! Give her a hug from us and get well kisses too. Hope it passes quickly!
Oh you said it so well! Hope your little one heals soon!
Oh Barbie I hope she didn't get this virus from us! We've been up and down since Wednesday! I thought the antibiotics had kicked it but now I am feeling yucky again! Glad she is doing better. A good reminder to always check, even when they cry!
Oh goodness, Barbie. I can so relate. We have had many a 104 degree night with Briggs and I've been up with Hadley all night long giving her breathing treatments the last couple of nights after a lovely diagnosis of spaspodic croup. It's aweful but there is something bittersweet about being needed so much and being so blessed to be the one to love on her. I get it :) But man, it still is hard. We'll be thinking about you guys...
You totally did the right thing taking her in - what a scary ordeal for you! I'm so glad it's nothing terrible though and will be praying that she's back to her cheerful self soon!
I know how you feel. Ethan got over a cold a few weeks ago. He had such a hard time. He would wake up in the middle of the night coughing. Some nights it was so bad we turn our bathroom into a sauna and just let him breath in the warm moist air. When he had the fever, he just wanted to be held. I hated it!
You poor things:( I hate fevers. It never hits me that I have 3 kids, until they get sick. Then it feels like I have a whole litter. I'll be thinking of you and praying for speedy recovery.Hugs!
Im so sorry Aubrey is feeling bad. I hate being worried about them. Im glad you got a second opinion. Hang in there. The thought of something bad happening to one of my little people makes me sick!
Wow, so glad that you guys took her in and she is on her way to better days and nights! And what a blessing that the "hard" times are just the heart ache times...so special that you can love someone sooo much!
funny what you said about crime shows. talia just wrote something about being a mom is being a mom to all children. and sara commented how she can no longer watch crime shows because of hard it is to see kids hurt or in need. so true.
I'm SO glad she's better. =)
And good to see you last night, however brief it was.
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