A lot to process

We have a healthy heartbeat! Praise God! Our little baby is measuring at about 7wks 2days which puts the due date at Jan. 2, 2010. To be honest with you, I think this was the first time I've actually teared up at an early ultrasound. With Aubrey and Baby Bee, I just took it all for granted. I assumed that I would have a healthy pregnancy and nothing would go wrong. Obviously, this year has been a year of learning, and I now realize that the tiny little beating heart of our itty bitty baby is nothing short of a miracle.

As if I haven't had enough to process already, I was surprised when the doctor told me that along with our healthy little baby was also a blighted ovum, an empty sac. At some point during the last 7 weeks, I had TWO fertilized eggs, two growing babies in my body. The second baby has since stopped growing and now only a small, empty gestational sac lingers as evidence of its existence. It's just a lot to process. A wee bit sad that there is yet another baby that I won't meet, but mostly just happy that there is a healthy one that will hopefully fill my heart with overwhelming love when it arrives in *December* or January (wishful thinking). Then there is the anxiousness that comes with knowing that I may pass the blighted ovum. This would be accompanied with bleeding and cramping. I'm pretty much freaking out about how I will deal with that if/when the time comes. I know it will be nerve wrecking. Hopefully, I'll be one of the lucky ones and my body will just absorb it.

So, like the title says, a lot to process. And a process I'm sure it will be. Thankfully, my doctor is going to be seeing me every 2 weeks to keep a close eye on things. I'll hopefully be seeing my sweet baby again on June 1st.